Breakfast is Boring

Last night before we dozed off to sleep, a commercial about s’mores popped on the television and I was struck with a genius idea to improve the campfire dessert: peanut butter. I told Brad Pitt, “You know, I don’t really like the marshmallow part of s’mores so I think it would be awesome to spread peanut butter on one side of the graham cracker and put the chocolate on the other!” He didn’t like my idea, explaining that the marshmallow is “the best part.” (I completely disagree. The only reason I would buy marshmallows is because they are so fun to catch on fire and then twirl around like a 4th of July sparkler – but be careful, they will fly off your stick. I learned that one summer when a marshmallow zipped through the air and hit Brad Pitt square in the chest.* He was fine afterward but the marshmallow was not.)

Immediately following the s’mores commercial was an ad for Lucky Charms. Ironically, I got all excited and told him how much I love the marshmallows in Lucky Charms. “I bet my parents hated us when we were kids,” I said. “We would pick out all the marshmallows, because they were the best part, and leave all the cereal bits in the box because they were disgusting.” You have to admit, those randomly shaped leprechaun marshmallows are the bomb.

This led to a heated discussion about cereals and which ones were the best** and how those packages of tiny, individual sized boxes only have two or three really good kinds of cereal and the rest suck and you have to fight with your sibling on who gets what box. But then I said, “Actually I wasn’t really that into cereal for breakfast. I liked eating macaroni & cheese or fish sticks before school. Or leftover dinner from the night before. Especially lasagna.”

Which is true. And still holds true today. Minus the fish sticks. I haven’t had a fish stick in a very long time. But macaroni & cheese, yes. Leftover lasagna? Hell yes. Other things I commonly eat for breakfast include leftover Mexican food, salami sandwiches, pizza (usually leftover & cold but sometimes a fresh & hot Totinos) and hot dogs with Sriracha. The only “breakfast-like” thing I ever crave would be a Super Sonic Breakfast Burrito. When I realized how many calories were packed into one burrito, though, I broke that addiction and went back to hot dogs.
Brad Pitt eats oatmeal with raisins.

*Note to my homeowner’s insurance agent: This marshmallow incident was in the woods when we were camping. It was not at home like the firepit incident from the other night.

**The best cereals (in no specific order)
Cinnamon Toast Crunch (both agreed)
Frosted Flakes (both agreed)
Honey Smacks (me)
Cap’n Crunch (Brad Pitt)
Corn Pops (both agreed)
Shredded Wheat (One guess who said this boring cereal was the best)


6 thoughts on “Breakfast is Boring

  1. I think Brad Pitt and I have some things in common (who woulda thunk?). During the school year, I alternate between oatmeal and grape nuts. However, when I tell you that my favorite grandma is the one who taught me to like them (and who is now dead 😦 ), I think you will understand.

  2. Growing up I was just like you—I always ate leftovers from dinner the night before for breakfast. My favorite was a roast beef sandwich. Now I alternate between muffins and cream of wheat with blueberries. As I type that, I realize it sounds like an old person’s breakfast.


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