Scrapple

Vegetarians Beware: This post may really gross you out. You’ve been warned.

On Saturday Brad Pitt and I tried Scrapple.

What is Scrapple, you may be asking. Well, I will tell you. I’m providing a link (HERE) so you can do some research on your own. But I see my site stats on a daily basis and I know how many (or should I say how few) of you actually click the links. Shame, shame, shame. I put those links in there for good reason. It gives you more info! And sometimes pictures! Don’t you like pictures? Anyway, the link I provided for more info on Scrapple is the Urban Dictionary description. I felt it provided the best and most accurate description of what you could expect from Scrapple.

Anyway, for those too lazy to click the link I will do my best to explain Scrapple.

It is food. (Barely, in my opinion.)
It is common in Pennsylvania – If someone talks about Scrapple, you can reply with “Ohhhhhh, That’s so Pennsylvania Dutch of you.”
It is meat. And other things.
It is in the form of a loaf and then sliced thin and browned in a skillet and usually served alongside eggs (or whatever) for breakfast.
I bet some people eat it at other times in the day.
I will not be eating it at other times of the day.

When our server asked us how we liked the Scrapple, we smiled and said “Well, I bet it will grow on us.”

Yeah, if I added a fuck ton of hot sauce or steak sauce or horseradish and ignored the fact that it was mushy. And not in a good way.

My understanding is the mushy part comes from the “filler” ingredients … corn meal and buckwheat flour. When I repeated “corn meal, corn meal, corn meal” in my head I was able to swallow the bite of Scrapple. If I had known what else specifically was in my meat patty, I might not have been able to accomplish the task.

I suppose I should add (because my mom is probably thinking it): Yes, I tend to eat some bizarre things without any trouble. But I also usually have some liquid courage (beer, cocktails, wine) flowing through my body before these adventurous culinary endeavors. The Scrapple Attempt was at breakfast. And there were no Bloody Mary’s or mimosas in sight.

In case you want to try your hand at making Scrapple at home, I’ve done the honors of Google searching recipes.

Some recipes, like this fancy one from Food Network, include pork heart, ribs and liver. I was eating my lunch when I read that recipe today. Everything was a-okay until the first line that read “trim the fat from around the heart and remove the sinews.” When my eyes fell on sinews, my mouth stopped chewing the pasta I was eating as I was forced into gag-prevention-mode. Sinews.

Oh.

God.

Sinews.

I found other recipes, that were a bit more modest and used more, um, convenient ingredients. Like this one from AllRecipes.com that simply incorporates ground pork. Okay. Now we are talking. A bit more mentally tolerable.

Another Food Network recipe from an episode of Diners, Drive Ins and Dives, uses a wide variety of ingredients that actually make the meal sound promising. Promising enough that I will try Scrapple again. Hopefully with a mimosa in one hand and a Bloody Mary in the other.