She Came, She Saw, She Conquered

My Seeester came to visit and after a whirlwind five days of adventures around Pennsylvania and New York I’m back in front of my laptop and ready to share some of the madness we experienced.

I shall share a summary of her visit which will explain why I haven’t posted anything for 5+ days. I’ve just been too busy having fun.

Day 1:

• Picked her up at the Philadelphia airport and checked into hotel.
  

  Two beds. First time in forever she has had a bed all to herself. I, on the other hand, had to share with Brad Pitt.

• Went to Reading Terminal Market.
• Lunch at Melt Kraft in the market.
  

  Photo of actual sandwich coming soon. You must wait for Sandwich Saturday.

  Best Grilled Cheese Sandwich ever.

• Met up with Brad Pitt on his lunch break and snagged a few bites of the largest hoagie sandwich I’ve ever seen. Delicious, too.
• Shopped a little bit and went to Federal Donut for a donut. It was National Donut Day, after all.
• Nap Time. This is a luxury to my Seeester as she has two young children and they, apparently, never let her sleep. Ever.
• Jack Johnson Concert. Oh me, oh my. What fun we had. Not to mention the people watching. Apparently crop tops are very much back in style.
• Meatballs for dinner at the Jack Johnson Concert. This is a story in and of itself which I will share in a separate post.
• Post Concert Munchies at Chili’s. Yes, Chili’s. It was right by the hotel and it was open. End of story.

There were many quotable moments from the evening. Many I just can not share. But here are a few:

“Do you guys even know who Boys II Men are???”
“Your underwear is showing.”
“Let’s be clear. If one of us gets herpes this weekend, we all get herpes this weekend.”
“Turn down the thermostat. -What’s the temperature at now?- I don’t know, its Celsius.”

I’m not even going to bother adding further description on the context of each of those quotes. You can just use your imagination.

Day 2:

• Headed back to The LV (Lehigh Valley – our new home base) and picked up The Little Monster and her spunky sister Princess Pepper.
• Showed off The Condo to My Seeester.
• Lunch at Armetta’s in “downtown” Emmaus. Remember Armetta’s? Its the Italian restaurant I told you about that also offers taco salads on their menu. I love this place.
• Nap Time. Yes, my friends, we let my Seeester into the world of relaxation and allowed her to sleep as much as her tired body required. Plus I like naps and most definitely needed one.
• Driving tour of Historic Bethlehem which basically means we showed her the main street that has all the restaurants and shops and then drove up and down the adjacent area with historic homes all of which are beautiful, all of which are highly desirable and all of which are totally out of our price range.
• Dinner and drinks at The Bookstore Speakeasy. Fun. Fun. Fun, fun, fun.

Huh. Interesting. No photos to share for Day 2. I mean, I have photos, but none that I feel like sharing. No one wants to see a larger-than-life stromboli from Armetta’s anyway.

 

Day 3:

• Started the day with a BBQ at the home of one of Brad Pitt’s office mates. (Suddenly I sound English. Or Australian. Mates? Not sure what happened there, but I like it so I’m keeping it.) The Office Mate had received the Grand Daddy of All Grills on loan and we were excited to see what it could do. We are talking a grill that costs as much as a car. A car with a $14,000 sticker in the window. I am blown away that anybody in their right mind would spend that much money on a BBQ grill. So, we had to witness it in person. Plus we had tasty snacks. The grilled oysters were my favorite. My Seeester did not eat any. She is not brave like me.

Me Katie. Me like Food From the Sea. She Becky. She Like Plain Pasta and Food From Four Legged Animals. [Insert courageous thumping of fists against chest here.]

• Off to the wineries. Its no Sonoma or Napa, but Lehigh Valley has a fair smattering of wineries along a “wine trail” and we had just enough time to visit a couple. Brad Pitt joined us. The first had tolerable wine with great scenery. The second offered more impressive wine (I was actually inclined to buy a bottle and drink it) and a fun picnic area near the grape vines.
• Quick Pitt Stop at Wegmans to show my Seeester the most amazing grocery store ever. And to pick up ingredients for dinner.
• Dinner at The Condo. Chicken Spidieni with Risotto. And more wine.
• Episode 1 of Season 2 Orange is the New Black. Sigh. Its such a great show.
• Bedtime. I dreamed about bugs under my bed all night. Pretty sure I can blame the message-carrying-roaches in OITNB.

Day 4:

• New York City!!! My Seeester and I made it to the Big Apple around the lunch hour and spent a little bit of time in Eataly. I feel Eataly is a must-see for anyone who loves Italian food and food markets and has never been to NYC.
• Prosecco and Parmesan for a snack.
• Plates of pasta for lunch. Heaven.
• NYC Souvenirs for the kids.
• The Museum of Sex. I’ve passed this place so many times but I’ve never actually gone inside. Until this week. We pretty much stuck to the gift shop area (it was enough to take in) and skipped the exhibits (mainly because I had no idea where the entrance to the actual “museum” was) and we stocked up on things to give people for Christmas.*
• New York Public Library. Love this building. Its beautiful. And I got to re-enact the scene where Carrie finds out Big is not showing up for their wedding. Minus dropping my phone to the ground. I have an iPhone. Not a flip phone. Also minus the peacock headpiece. I wasn’t in costume for the re-enactment.
• More shopping.
• Times Square. Yes, its super touristy and I really prefer to avoid it. But its iconic New York and I felt like my Seeester needed to see it. And see it, she did. Including the chick walking around naked with only body paint covering her bazingas and taking photos for tips. Much more interesting than my encounter with Elmo and friends a few weeks ago.
• Toys R Us. The Toys R Us in Times Square is like nothing you’ve seen before. It was like nothing I had seen before. I typically freak out in Toys R Us. To date, I had only encountered grimy stores with equally grimy (and probably germ-filled) children running around. So the first thing I said to my Seeester was “Hurry the fuck up and lets get out of here as quickly as possible.” But there was too much to take in. Geoffrey the Giraffe and Spiderman were walking around. There was an enormous, three story carousel. Ridiculous and intriguing toys on display (much different than the toys we saw at the Museum of Sex.) Eventually, I started talking selfies with Monster High displays and trying on Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle masks. And then my Seeester turned into a crazy person trying to get past something that was blocking the aisle with Elsa from Frozen. It was like watching a crack addict trying to get more crack. (Or what I would imagine a crack addict looking for crack looks like, I’ve never actually watched anyone who needed crack try to get more.) And when my Seeester discovered the “prettier” Elsa was stocked behind the cash register, I witnessed a level of excitement that was beyond bizarre.
• I bought a TMNT mask and explained to the cashier that it was for me and I was going to use it to freak out my husband while he was sleeping. That story, also, deserves its own post.
• Back to Pennsylvania and pizza dinner at home.

Day 5:

• The sad day. The day I had to drive back to Philly and drop my Seeester off at the airport so she could return home to her sleepless, napless lifestyle.
• We hit up IKEA on the way. She was quite impressed.
• And then I hit up John’s Roast Pork after I left her at the airport. I needed something to soothe the sadness. It worked. But I would rather she had just stayed.

 

So, that is basically the past five days in a nutshell. Many photos not included. Many stories not included. Many more stories to come, because as I said earlier, some are deserving of their own post.

Big Thanks to My Little Seeester for visiting!! She Came, She Saw, She Conquered my tiny portion of the eastern time zone. And I’m already ready for her to come back for more.

*Just kidding, Mom. You aren’t getting sex toys for Christmas. That would be really fucking weird. You’re getting some for your birthday in September!!
— Okay I am still joking. Because that would still be really fucking weird. But I am cracking up with laughter right now. —